A morning in the life of Mum, toddler and baby

A morning in the life of Mum, toddler and baby: feeling a sense of achievement at 8am that, even though I am not showered, we three are at least dressed; attempting to help toddler not fall down the toilet whilst breastfeeding; nearly get baby off to sleep in my arms at the same time that toddler announces she needs the toilet again; rearrange toddler’s room whilst baby miraculously sleeps on her own for longer than 10 minutes; realise the house is a tip and discuss with self that I can only do so much; suddenly tidy like a maniac when the health visitor turns up 20 minutes early; put Tom’s beer bottle in recycling in case health visitor assumes I have been drinking; foolishly tell health visitor that I have been worrying that the girls might fall down/hurt themselves and she books in another visit to check that I’m not about to have a nervous breakdown; tell health visitor that praying helps me to calm down and she makes notes in the red book, with raised eyebrows, which probably read ‘crazy lady, but at least she’s found a coping mechanism’; realise at lunchtime that I still haven’t brushed toddler’s teeth; attempt a relaxing shower but toddler climbs in to join the party; breastfeed again at the same time as attempting to discipline toddler for throwing her knickers across the room when I had asked her to get dressed about 30 minutes ago; baby refusing to sleep so end up dancing round the home with a practiced, specialised jiggle-walk; try to tell toddler off again because the knickers are now on her head but end up laughing; manage to get toddler’s lunch whilst comfort eating Oreos; eat a cheese sandwich whilst maintaining the jiggle-walk. And phew, it’s officially the afternoon.


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